Mind Reader

A few weeks ago I accompanied a few friends to view the PostSecret gallery in Walnut Creek.

Beyond walls decorated with secrets on postcards mailed by various people around the world was a room where two tables stacked with pieces of tiny paper invited visitors of the gallery to jot down whatever secret they wanted to share.

Without giving more than five minutes of thought, I took a piece of paper and wrote down a secret I have always felt, but could never find the opportunity to vocalize without worrying about sounding like an insincere fool.

My secret: I wish I knew what you were thinking, so that I could turn into .

I honestly wish I sometimes had the power to read minds.

My desire does not stem from any interest in being the world’s greatest know-it-all, but instead comes from a longing to know the right words to say to people at the right time.

I mean not to feel nosy and want to put a disclaimer on any possible hints at expressing a wish to snoop into everyone’s business.

I honestly wish I could read minds so I would know what to say to turn one’s negativity into a positive reality.

There are not enough people around that truly believe their level of greatness.

It seems that no amount of deserved compliments or honesty can adequately convince people to truly believe in themselves.

It isn’t fair for the listener or the teller.

One does not have to possess the ability to read minds to know when a friend is feeling distressed, upset or any emotion that isn’t happiness.

The perfect response is what really gets me.

Relying on instinct and all possible schemes to crack a smile on someone’s face, only to see it either not work or birth a grateful, but not genuine, grin is painful.

I’m running out of ways to express how great the people I know are.

And I fear that, at the same time, they are not running out of ways to continue believing they are not great.

So for now, this message is ambiguously addressed to all that have not yet acknowledged or accepted the qualities that make them wonderful: You matter. All the time.

And I promise you don't need to possess the ability to read my mind to hear that from me.

To thine own self PEE true

Perhaps humiliation is for the faint of heart, if only for the purpose of strengthening it.

Levels of embarrassment are based on interpretation. Some people would be mortified in certain situations, while others simply carry that, “I had to do what I had to do” or “What’s done is done” attitude.

With every humiliating moment, there appears to be at least an inch of growth within people. It is that chance of advancement toward becoming comfortable with oneself.

Besides, isn’t it best for us to laugh at our own insecurities rather than live in constant worry that others are already doing it behind our backs?

Imagine a situation where you can’t leave the room because something important is going on. Let’s say there’s this big, important lecture where undivided attention earns a student the right to pass the entire semester without ever actually doing work (ideal, but let’s imagine).

Yet, it has been nearly an hour and a half of unbearable and haunting inner turmoil: You are holding in, what feels like, a tank load of pee in your bladder.

Menacing.

The clock finally strikes and the lecture is finished. The word “bathroom” echoes in the mind over and over again as “blood” does to a hungry vampire.

You scatter, sprint, pant a little bit and finally make it to the restroom. There’s nobody in the bathroom. Sweet. Find the way into the oasis that is an empty stall. Let this torture be gone and flushed!

Immediately, and refreshingly, you begin to pee with such vigor that the sound of it hitting the toilet water can be compared to that of a racehorse as it stands on hay.

In the midst of relief, someone else walks into the bathroom. Embarrassment overflows because this person, whoever she may be, could probably be thinking, “Yikes, that’s some fast peeing.”

Shame, agony and the death of sophistication as you know it consumes and suffocates the mind.

In situations like these and many others, whether major or minor, it is important to remember that, despite what happens, no amount of humiliation can mark a scar on one’s dignity if one does not allow it.

We live. We pee. We feel a little shame. In the end, it is important that we continue to move on.

Embarrassing moments are those random checkpoints that test people and asks them, “Are you okay with being you?”

Whether you laugh or cry in response provides enough information to answer the question.

May we know ourselves best through the option of laughter.

So, how about them digits?

“Did he ever call you?”

In a discussion with a friend about the communication between me and the current love of my life, Joe Jonas, he brought up an interesting topic that has since then been stranded in my mind: How does it feel knowing that only 10 digits separate you from talking to any specific person in the world?

Ten digits from now and I could be hearing the voices of the Jonas Brothers on the other end, from wherever they are and whatever time. I cannot predict what the conversation would be like, but knowing that there is a chance of being connected with them is amazing. Ten digits are making all the difference.

It is a psychotic thought, I’ll admit. I am pretty sure if Joe Jonas ever reads this, he’ll sigh with relief knowing that I do not have his number and have absolutely no way of acquiring it.

Yet, it is an honest thought. Nearly everyone on the planet has a cell phone or house phone. We are all separated by one strategic lineup of numbers.

Egads.